I will be here...

A bunch of us attended the most awesome concert ever on Tuesday night! Michael W Smith and Steven Curtis Chapman....oh yeah! They sang "I will be here" and while I sat there holding Matt's hand I just reflected on all that we have been through over the past 10 years we have been together (7 married years). So I know this is probably dorky....but I'm going to put down the lyrics and write next to them what crossed my mind as I reflected on our relationship.

I will be Here Lyrics

Tomorrow mornin' if you wake up And the sun does not appear

I...I will be here

I remembered feeling like the sun didn't appear the morning I found out I was pregnant in college. But guess what! When I called Matt to tell him....he said, "I love you and we will get through this!"

If in the dark we lose sight of love Hold my hand and have no fear'

Cause I...I will be here

We went through a lot of "dark" times when we were dating. My parents were totally against our relationship. My dad especially made things very hard for us. I think I got silent treatment from him the entire 2 years Matt and I dated. If you could call it silent treatment....my dad barely took the time to speak to me ever anyways. I remember that when times were tough and I would cry to Matt about maybe just ending our relationship because it was to hard to deal with my parents, he would just sit there and listen. He knew I needed to find my way and he just sat there and held my hand and loved me.

I will be here...When you feel like bein' quiet When you need to speak your mind I will listen

There are times Matt wants to comfort me and I tell him I just need to be alone and I head to the shower to cry in private. And then there are times when I just need to yell and scream and sob about the hurt I am dealing with the issues I have with my dad....and he lets me do that too.

And I will be here When the laughter turns to cryin'

Through the winnin' and losin' and tryin'We'll be together'

Cause I will be here

Tomorrow mornin' if you wake up And the future is unclear

Right now I feel like the future is so unclear with where I am going with my dad. I feel like, God where are you in all of this?!? But then I remember my favorite verse: Jeremiah 29:11 says that God has plans to give me hope and a future. So even if I can't see the work he's doing through all of this, I know that this father has plans for me that won't hurt me, so I just rest in that knowledge.

I...I'll be here

Just as sure as seasons are made for change Our lifetimes are made for years

I...I will be here

I will be here....You can cry on my shoulder

I have spent so much time crying on Matt's shoulder. He just holds me and I feel his love for me in the strength of his arms and he holds on as if he fears that if he lets go I will just die.

When the mirror tells us we're older I will hold you

And I will be here To watch you grow in beauty

He says I'm growing in beauty now as my belly continues to protrude farther and farther. I don't understand it....but he still looks at me with lust in eyes even with what I think is so disgusting right now!

And tell you all the things you are to me

I will be here

I will be true To the promise I have made

To you and to the One who gave you to me

I...I will be here

And just as sure as seasons are made for change

Our lifetimes are made for years'

Cause I...I will be here....We'll be together'

Cause I will be here

I thought that I loved Matt when we were dating and then I thought I loved him a little more when we got married. Then with seeing him grow into the father I wished I could've experienced I knew I loved him even more. But with every day....I fall deeper in love with this man! What will it be like 50 years from now?!? I cannot imagine....All I know is that "We'll be together" and I will always "hold true to the promise I have made to him and to the One who gave Matt to me!"